Kimeu is at home

Its a pretty simple story actually. Patrick's mom called the woman who hired Kimeu and chewed him out for hiring a school-aged child. (Go Mom!) So the woman fired Kimeu and told him to go home. So he did. He is now staying with Grandma Beth (whom he was staying with before we sent him to boarding school.) Mom asked him what he was thinking when he ran away. He said that he wanted to earn enough money to start his own kiosk. I can only imagine that he didn't feel like he had any other options. So for now, we'll let him get settled in at home for awhile before we move on to the next step.

Sometimes God closes the door.

So it had genuinely been my hope to adopt Kimeu. But God has definitively closed the door on this hope. 6 days ago I had emailed the Child Welfare Society of Kenya in order to inquire on adoption laws. Today I received a response.

" The child you would want to adopt has already attained the age of 16 years. According to the US laws on inter-country adoption, it is not possible to adopt a child who is aged 16 and above."

Of course, this breaks my heart. But I know that God's plans for Kimeu are so much better than mine. We will continue to pursue having him evaluated for any learning disabilities. Perhaps get him enrolled in a technical school. We will still do everything we can to give him an opportunity to get an education that will enable him to provide for himself and his future family.

Please continue to pray with us!

Kimeu update

So Patrick hasn't talked to his mother in a couple of days, but the latest we know is that they've gotten the phone number of the woman who hired him but haven't been able to talk to Kimeu himself yet. So please continue to keep Kimeu's safe return home in your prayers.

There is another exciting development though! This morning I received a reply from one of the several emails I sent out requesting information on assessment for dyslexia. The email came from dyslexiakenya.org. She told me where to take Kimeu, when to take him there and how much it would cost. She even included information on Parent/Teacher workshops! What a blessing. So after Kimeu gets home, that will be our next step. So keep on praying!!

Kimeu cont...

I've really been seeing God working the past 24 hours. A friend of mine emailed to say that they were praying James 1:5 and Phil 4:6-7 for me. Well, I believe both of those prayers have been answered. God has provided direction and peace for us as we seek the best way to help Kimeu. Shortly after I received that email, things just started happening. I was talking to my mom about the situation and she suggested that Kimeu might have dyslexia. Obviously we can't tell from here. I've been suspecting a learning disability (aka, a different learning style!) might be in play here anyway. I asked Patrick about it and he said that he didn't believe there were any resources in Kenya for people with dyslexia, etc. Now I have to say this is the FIRST time Patrick has ever been wrong ;), but thank goodness he was! Googling "dyslexia Kenya" returned several results and I was able to get a few emails out making inquiries about where to have Kimeu evaluated. But the blessings didn't stop there. Here are some ways that God has given us some direction:

• The call from my mom mentioning dyslexia.
  
• A missionary friend in Kenya commented that she knows about resources there for children with special needs AND she knows something about the adoption process out there.
• A friend from my church in New York emailed me to say that she works for the Learning Disabilities Association and she just happens to be going to Kenya this summer.

Don't forget the ways God has given me peace in this whole thing!

• A friend here in Orange County knows all sorts of stuff about raising money for the adoption process. This gives me peace of mind that if we end up there, lack of money won't be a closed door.
• My Aunt emailed me to share a story about how she's found peace in a difficult situation and reminded me that I'm not the only one who cares about Kimeu. God loves him too.
• In the midst of my prayer time last night, God interrupted me mid-sentence to give me Jeremiah 29:11. "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." This gives me peace that God loves Kimeu and has good plans in store for him.
• Knowing how many people are out there praying for Kimeu gives me great hope that this thing will turn out all right.

Thank you everyone so much for your prayers in this matter and your offers of help and knowledge, etc. I have one more prayer request to share with you concerning Kimeu. This one is more of immediate urgency than the other. The prayer request is that he goes home. Patrick's mother doesn't actually know where he is right now. She knows the direction he's in, but doesn't know where to go to find him. Please pray that either God would lead Kimeu to go home or that Patrick's mother will somehow be able to find him and bring him home so that we can help him.

Kimeu

I have an urgent prayer request. You may have heard Patrick or I talk about Patrick's cousins, Sammy and Kimeu. If you haven't, I'll give you a brief history. Sammy and Kimeu's mother died several years ago. They're father abandoned them and they were living with their grandmother after that. A short while ago, their father came back to care for them only to die shortly thereafter. So Sammy and Kimeu are now orphans. With the financial help of my parents and Patrick's family, we've put them in a private boarding school there in Kenya. Sammy is doing well. Kimeu on the other hand is not. He's been doing poorly in school and started running away. Patrick's mother has continually taken him back to the school. We found out today that he ran away from school for the 5th time. Only this time he only went home long enough to change clothes before running away from there also. Patrick's mother got word that he was seen about 30-40 miles away and that he is working tending cows for some woman. They're still trying to figure that out. Since I first met Kimeu almost 6 years ago now, this boy has been close to my heart. He has such a sweet soul. You can see it just looking in his eyes. My heart hurts for him because I want the best for him, as if he were my own son. My heart's desire is to help this boy succeed in life. To see him thriving! Whether that's by adopting him and bringing him here or getting him the help he needs in Kenya as far as being evaluated for learning disabilities. He is 16 now though, so we are rapidly running out of time if we're going to adopt him. Please take a moment to pray for God to guide us in this matter and to give us success in helping Kimeu. I feel sick to my stomach thinking about this right now and I'm crying over this boy. In my mind, not helping him is not an option, so we need lots of prayer support on this!

Praying James 1:5 on this one! "But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him."

Culture differences

The textbook for my Interpersonal Communication class just used the differences between American and Kenyan cultures to demonstrate how different cultures are in terms of individualism. I found this interesting why? Because I'm an American married to a Kenyan! See the quoted section below. Fun stuff.

"Individualism: One and Many

One of the most prominent dimensions of a culture is the dimension of individualism versus collectivism. Individualistic cultures, such as those in North America, value individual achievement and personal accomplishment. Collectivistic cultures, including many Asian cultures, value group and team achievement. One researcher summed up the American goal system this way:

Chief among the virtues claimed is self-realization. Each person is viewed as having a unique set of talents and potentials. The translation of these potentials into actuality is considered the highest purpose to which one can de- vote one’s life.

Conversely, in a collectivistic culture, people strive to attain goals for all members of the family, group, or community. In Kenyan tribes, for example,

Nobody is an isolated individual. Rather, his [or her] uniqueness is a secondary fact. In this new system group activities are dominant, responsibility is shared, and accountability is collective. Because of the emphasis on collectivity, harmony and cooperation among the group tends to be emphasized more than individual function and responsibility.

Individualistic cultures tend to be more loosely knit socially; individuals feel responsible for taking care of themselves and their immediate families. In collectivistic cultures, individuals expect more support from others; they also experience more loyalty to and from the community. Because collectivistic cultures place more value on “we” than “I,” teamwork approaches usually succeed better in their workplaces. U.S. businesses have tried to adopt some of Japan’s successful team strategies for achieving high productivity."

(Interpersonal Communication: Relating to Others, 6th Edition. p. 95).

Grieving the death of Osama bin Laden

I saw this quote on The Christian Homekeeper Network blog and I can't help but borrow from there.

"I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. "

—Jessica Dovey


Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that"

— Martin Luther King Jr.

The reason I posted this is because of all the celebration, rejoicing and delight people are taking in the death of Osama Bin Laden. I was even saying this to my husband last night. I do not understand it. Yes, I understand the hurt and pain and terror that man caused so many people. The deaths and grief that came at his hands. But taking joy in his death? I can't do it. I would rather have seen him captured and brought to justice for his crimes. Not that I am the judge, but as far as I know, Osama Bin Laden is going to hell. I would not wish an eternal existence separated from God on ANYONE. Even my worst enemy.

Here is a quote from the article "Is hell literally a place of fire and brimstone?" by GotQuestions.org.

"In addition to fire, the New Testament describes hell as a bottomless pit (abyss) (Revelation 20:3), a lake (Revelation 20:14), darkness (Matthew 25:30), death (Revelation 2:11), destruction (2 Thessalonians 1:9), everlasting torment (Revelation 20:10), a place of wailing and gnashing of teeth (Matthew 25:30), and a place of gradated punishment (Matthew 11:20-24; Luke 12:47-48; Revelation 20:12-13). The very variety of hell’s descriptors argues against applying a literal interpretation of any particular one. For instance, hell’s literal fire could emit no light, since hell would be literally dark. Its fire could not consume its literal fuel (persons!) since their torment is non-ending. Additionally, the gradation of punishments within hell also confounds literalness. Does hell’s fire burn Hitler more fiercely than an honest pagan? Does he fall more rapidly in the abyss than another? Is it darker for Hitler? Does he wail and gnash more loudly or more continually than the other? The variety and symbolic nature of descriptors do not lessen hell, however—just the opposite, in fact. Their combined effect describes a hell that is worse than death, darker than darkness, and deeper than any abyss. Hell is a place with more wailing and gnashing of teeth than any single descriptor could ever portray. Its symbolic descriptors bring us to a place beyond the limits of our language—to a place far worse than we could ever imagine."

Osama bin Laden is going to that place that is far worse than we could ever imagine. Don't get me wrong. I hate what he did. I still cry whenever I see pictures of the twin towers on fire. I still remember watching them fall and grieving for the lost souls there. I really want to stress that I do believe that what the US Military did was appropriate. He did get what he deserved. But I wouldn't wish hell on anyone, not even Osama bin Laden. And guess what? The deadline is death. I'm not taking even the slightest inkling of joy in that.

Remember Jesus' words in Matthew 5:43-48?

"You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor^[a] and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect."

Some scriptures from the old testament along those same lines:

"Do not rejoice when your enemy falls,
And do not let your heart be glad when he stumbles"
~Proverbs 24:17

"'As I live!' declares the Lord GOD, 'I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that the wicked turn from his way and live..."
~Ezekiel 33:11

I really hope that my fellow Christians are with me on this. Remember that "he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." (2 Peter 3:9). He didn't say "everyone except for Osama bin Laden." When he said "everyone", he really meant everyone. That's not an option anymore for Osama bin Laden. And THAT is something to grieve over, not rejoice in.